Am I the Drama?" Why You Feel Stuck Between High-Functioning Anxiety and Past Trauma
Let’s be honest: Being a millennial woman in Kenya right now is an extreme sport.
You’re likely juggling a career that demands 110%, navigating the "when are you getting married/having kids" interrogation at every family gathering, and trying to maintain a social life that looks aesthetically pleasing on Instagram. You are the "Strong Friend." You are the one who has it all together.
But when the lights go off and the notifications are silenced, it’s a different story.
Maybe it’s the racing heart at 3 AM wondering if you sent that email. Maybe it’s that heavy, sinking feeling that no matter how much you achieve, you’re still not "enough." Or maybe, it’s the sudden, unexplained irritability when things don’t go perfectly—leaving you wondering, "Am I the drama? Or am I just exhausted?"
If this resonates, you aren’t alone. I see you. I see the high-functioning anxiety masking the pain, and I know that often, the root isn't just "stress"—it’s deep-seated trauma and self-esteem wounds trying to heal.
The "Good Girl" Trap: High-Functioning Anxiety
For many Kenyan millennial women, anxiety doesn't look like a panic attack in a public restroom (though it can). Often, it looks like perfectionism.
It’s the need to over-perform at work because you feel like an imposter. It’s the inability to say "no" to black tax or family demands because you fear disappointing people. This is high-functioning anxiety. It propels you forward, but it burns you out from the inside.
Systemic therapy teaches us that this anxiety didn’t just appear out of nowhere. It often stems from a system—your family, your school, or society—that taught you your worth was tied to your performance, not your existence.
When the Past is Present: Unpacking Trauma
We often think of trauma as a single, catastrophic event. But for many of us, trauma is "quiet."
It’s growing up in a home where emotions were ignored or punished.
It’s the subtle, consistent criticism you received about your body or choices.
It’s the relational wounds from dating in a modern world that feels like a minefield.
This "quiet" trauma chips away at your self-esteem. It tells you that you are unlovable unless you are useful. It makes you hyper-independent because you learned early on that you couldn't rely on others to soothe you.
Reclaiming Your Self-Esteem: The Way Through
Healing isn’t about becoming a "new you." It’s about unearthing the real you that’s been buried under layers of expectations and survival mechanisms.
At JK Therapy, our approach is eclectic and tailored. We don’t just look at you; we look at the systems around you.
We name the anxiety: We stop calling it "just stress" and start treating it with the care it deserves.
We process the trauma: We create a safe, non-judgmental space to unpack the baggage you’ve been carrying for years.
We build self-esteem: We help you rewrite the internal narrative from "I must do to be worthy" to "I am worthy simply because I am."
You Don’t Have to "Hustle" for Your Healing
You have spent years grinding for your degree, your job, and your status. You don’t need to grind for your mental health. You just need to show up.
Whether you are in Nairobi or joining us online from the diaspora, your space is ready. You can put down the armor. You can be vulnerable. And yes, you can finally rest.
Ready to start?
